Ladies, Boys, and Ladyboys...

First and foremost, I want to apologize for my lackluster blogging thus far. Given the pace and scope of my trip I have been on the move at a pretty quick pace. I hope that I makeup for some lost time here with the next couple posts....

"One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster

The bars are temples but the pearls ain't free

You'll find a god in every golden cloister

And if you're lucky then the god's a she

I can feel an angel sliding up to me" - Murray Head - 1984

Ah, yes... the 1984 hit that doesn't seem to make any sense whatsoever but somehow sums up Bangkok all at the same time. Before my trip to Thailand I had no real reference to Thailand at all, let alone it's capital city. Amazingly, after my time spent there, I have a crystal clear understanding of what good ole' Murray was talking about. I would like to summize my understanding of his words here and now. Think of me as your cryptex to deciphering the meaning of the greatest chorus of all time.... (shoutout to Mogs)

One night in Bangkok and the worlds your oyster.... First off, if Murray was only in Bangkok one night he's an idiot and his synopsis may be slightly generalized, which is something we all need to consider. If I could travel back in time to 1984, I would advise Murray to hang out with me for the 6 nights I stayed, as the logistics of just 1 night there are ridiculous. Now, Murray describes the world as your oyster. If by oyster he means dirty, slimy, and might get you sick, he's absolutely spot on! Bangkok has an ambiance for sure, but one trip down the Chao Phraya river and you'll understand exactly what Murray is saying.

The bars are temples but the pearls ain't free... Murray always tells it like it is. So, if by 'temples' he means crazy caves blasting american hip-hop treating it's customers to VIP tables and full bottles of Johnnie Walker, he's right! Many of the nicer places appear to emulate what you'd expect of a New York or LA club. And yes, unfortunately, the pearls as well as everything else here are not free... but don't despair because everything is paid for in Baht, which is basically paper monopoly money that has no real value!

You'll find a god in every golden cloister... The most challenging lyric thus far, you'll be amazed at how easy it is to understand what he's talking about here. Below is the formula:

God = Ladyboy

Golden Cloister = Seven Eleven

Genious! Murray, if I had seen things this clearly before I would have felt like I had already been there. Yes, it's true folks, there are 7-11 convienience stores on every single block of this city. This is no exageration, literally every block has a 7-11 on it regardless of where you are. Now, you may walk into some of these 7-11s and say to yourself, "There isn't a ladyboy in here..." Don't be a fool! You're just not looking close enough. Wait a minute and soon you will realize you were dead wrong. Additionally, an interesting side note is that these stores sell every flavor of Lays potato chips imaginable. Some of my personal favorites were Seaweed, Shrimp Seafood, and Double Pork Cheeseburger.

And if you're lucky then the god's a she... So I'm going to assume that Murray was a little bit more of a risktaker than me, because by the looks of this lyric I'm guessing he was leaving these things up to chance. Now remember folks, we've already learned that by god, Murray actually means ladyboy. So if luck is what Murray wants to rely on, who am I to stop him.

I can feel an angel sliding up to me... I'm not touching this one as I've always liked to think I could return to Avnet for employment in the future. You will have to figure this one out yourselves folks.

So, I hope that my words have helped you to better understand both Bangkok as well as Murray Head's 1984 chart topping hit. I can only imagine how the song would have turned out if Murray spent an entire week here.